The Kiss

Sunny with a slight overcast

Air fresh and crisp

Humidity levels low

Cool air whisking around our bodies

Yet we still sweat

Skin soft like butter

Just me and my lover

On my back gazing into your eyes

You climb on top and kiss my neck

Running your fingertips down my chest

A slight refreshing sigh is released from my mouth

Grabbing your back, I flip you

Ending up on top of you

I gently run my hand through your hair

Slowly bringing my face towards yours

Carefully avoiding your moist full lips I set my eyes on your right ear…

Nibbling and sucking on the lobe

Then change direction to your neck

Up your chin and end up frozen in the ambience of your hazel eyes

Your eyes so innocent and luring

Breaking me from my Trans was the kiss

The kiss that shook me down to my bones

The kiss that sped up my heart and slowed down the world

The kiss that brought a tear to my eye

The kiss that brought me back to real life

That kiss was the kiss of life

Farewell

When is it time to let it go?

Where did the love go?

Why is it not working out?

What brought on this self doubt?

Insecurities…

Feelings not only in oneself but in us.

Feelings of passionate unconditional love once were enough to quiet the restless minds…

Now selfishness oppose to selflessness has consumed us

Patience has run thin

And our love has evolved into an acute sense of resentment.

How could I love you so much and want nothing to do with you?

This isn't us…

This isn't me…

We're part of the same time but are from two completely different places.

In the beginning our hearts were intertwined like a double helix

Inseparable…

Today, we might as well be on two separate continents.

You, let insecurities and serpents tear us apart

Pride

Trust was, is, and will never be there.

Sacrifice no longer an option.

Our people have sacrificed enough

We've sacrificed enough

I've sacrificed enough…

But I'll make one more for us & that is us.

Farewell Love

Farewell

 

 

Numb

Desperate I cant believe im desperate

Because I cant have my own I was jealous of you and yours

Damn!!!

When did… where did… such envy and resentment come to pass???

Self esteem crushed, heart empty, stress levels overloading

Tears are no longer enough

The bottom is rapidly approaching

Depression

I cant trust myself

I second guess my own decisions

Always in a constant panic

My emotions are paper thin

No patience

When will it be my turn?

Broken spirit

Empty promises

Numb

Listen

If listening is one of the most important steps in communication…

Why don't you???

You hear what I'm saying but you don't listen

The pain I feel when you don't listen is almost as painful as the reality that you haven't claimed me as yours

My heart exploded when I thought you did, but I could have died when you said I misunderstood

Listening is one of the things I do best, but at that moment I wish it wasn't

But I'm still lonely

Day in and day out hoping

But wondering what did I do wrong?

Tears

Tears

Tears put me to sleep…

They are caused by the tears on my heart…

Tears are my comforter

The soft wet droplets pool in my eyes at night…

Dampening my pillow and moisturizing my face

Tears brought on by the stress of a unfulfilled life…

Skin never dry

No one to wipe them away…

Tears the expression of a emotion all too painful

Release of pressure the builds everyday…

Tears flow like the Niagara

Never obstructed

Falling to a salty sea of disappointment

Tears roll down…

My face

Weak

When is it time to say enough is enough?

When can I finally give up?

I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired

My heart is weak

My mind is scrambled

My emotions are heavy

And I don't know when my body will give in

I'm tired of loving

I'm tired of being strong

I'm tired of falling

Crying has become almost second nature

Why do you ask of me what I can't give?

Why am I expected to stay around?

How could you think that having you partially is enough?

Do you have any intentions of being with me?

I'm sick of feeling like the other one

I'm tired of being second best

I'm sick of life, scared of death

When will I learn to love myself?

Why is loving me is so hard?

Is it impossible?

I'm hurting on the inside

Smiling on the out

Because to tell you how I feel…

Is too much of a burden for you to bear

Because you're confused

I understand where you're coming from

But your life seems to be moving along

While mine is stuck in a infinite loop of disappointment

I want more than you're willing to commit to

But you also want things that I can't afford to give up

I want us to be

But the way things are going it's like it's not to be

What is a life full of accomplishments without someone to share them with?

NOTHING

Leaving me weak and lonely

 

Faith

As doubt sets in my mind

And insecurity sets on my person

I try to remember I trust you

I trust that if I stay strong for you

Inspite of not being strong for myself

That one day we will be

One day your eye will meet my eye

Your soft lips will touch mind

And your angelic spirit will touch my heart

And seal my soul ecstasy

As I remember to trust you

I trust that you are not using me

And the love that you have for me as a person is pure

And you wont turn your back on me

As I give my trust to you

I realize how weak I'm left

Defenseless, unprotected

Infantile almost

Yet, trust is still given

Because of my love of you as a person

My faith in you

Allows me to trust you

But my faith in us

Allows me to trust myself

A wise person said one

Who does not love oneself

Could never love another

But I believe the one

Who does not trust oneself

Could never love another

So do you trust me?